Bullying survivor brings prevention to Middle Village

Jodee Blanco brings her anti-bullying message to Middle Village Oct. 22. Photo courtesy Melissa Skolek
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A New York Times best-selling author and bullying survivor-turned-activist is coming to Middle Village in an effort to promote compassion by sharing her story with young students at an elementary school.

Jodee Blanco will deliver a bullying survival and prevention seminar at Our Lady of Hope School, at 61-21 71st St., Oct. 22 at 7 p.m., where she will talk about her own struggles as the target of severe school bullying and dispense advice to children, teachers and parents.

“I’m someone who was mercilessly tormented by my peers, from sixth-grade through high school, for the same reason so many thousands of other kids are, because I was different,” said Blanco, who grew up in Chicago and still lives there today. “As a survivor turned activist, I go into schools nationwide and I share my story with students, teachers and parents in an effort to motivate change.”

Blanco will spend the day meeting with students and teachers before the evening’s seminar, which Blanco said is free and open to the public. Just as she has in her nationwide appearances, Blanco will attempt to identify bullying and define its characteristics.

“Bullying is the desperate need to fit in run amok,” she said. “One of my primary messages to kids, and also to leadership, is that bullying isn’t only the mean things you do. It’s also the nice things you never do. Never including someone, even if it’s not necessarily intentional, can be bullying, too.”

And while technology has expanded a bully’s reach, it is fundamentally the same today as it was 30 years ago.

“Years ago, if you wanted to spread a nasty rumor about someone, you would write a note and pass it around math class,” she said. “But now that same rumor gets posted on Facebook or on YouTube. The weaponry used in bullying cuts a wider swatch now, but the impulse causing bullying is no different.”

According to Blanco, certain children are more prone to bullying than others — often referred to as an “old soul,” bullying victims tend to be intelligent, compassionate and sensitive beyond their years. And it is the less soulful individuals who tend to assume the role of bully.

“Bullying isn’t always motivated by jealousy,” she said. “Some kids are pressured into bullying in order to be popular — they are jockeying position to fit into a clique.”

The pressurized school environment can be torture for any child, including the bullies, Blanco said. In order to stave off bullying and its consequences, she believes that traditional punishment does not work and schools need to focus on compassion for both the victim and the perpetrator.

“The usual modes of punishment make angry kids angrier. And they will always release that anger in the direction of the most socially expendable children in the school,” she said. “The bully needs to be treated with compassion because there is most likely something going on at home.”

Blanco is the author of three books, “Please Stop Laughing at Me,” its companion piece, “Please Stop Laughing at Me … Journal: A Safe Place for Us to Talk,” and “Pease Stop Laughing at Us.”

Reach reporter Steve Mosco by e-mail at or by phone at 718-260-4546.

Posted 12:58 am, October 18, 2012
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Reader feedback

jolie says:
Last weekend was the Atlanta Premiere of my Anti-Bullying Music Video "My Song for Taylor Swift." The video provides a message of kindness, compassion and hope, and in just two weeks it has been seen in 45 states and 23 countries. We want it to help as many kids as possible, by empowering kids around the world to not be silent bystanders and to be a friend to someone who is being bullied. Even Taylor Swift was bullied, but she did not let her stop her from pursuing her dreams. Please check it out at If you like it I would really appreciate your passing it on to everyone you know. 100% of the net proceeds from the sale of the audio recording will benefit a national anti-bullying organization (the songs are available along with my others on iTunes and Amazon). Here is a link to the press release about the event in Atlanta with photos:
Thank you! Love, Jolie.
Oct. 28, 2012, 12:09 am
Julia says:
It is precisely because bullying is an intractable problem that schools and parents need to get more realistic about it. It’s not going away, so deal with it firmly so it can at least be kept under control. Thus, being a parent I've learned to be vigilant and more particular on the safety of my teens especially when it comes with bullying cases. Then I found this site that provides a protection for children from a safety mobile protection that can access family, friends and 911 in times of emergency. I just downloaded their application on their iPhone. Here’s where you can find it:
Nov. 8, 2012, 10:32 am

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